Here’s an advertisement for the Nancy 7” single. We printed these out a while ago but I haven’t had a computer/scanner, threw it down the stairs cuz it didn’t work. Mi mon Raul drew this one night.
Choosing to not have sex with anyone when I move to a new place is cool because I’m building emotionally intimate relationships and not feeling the need to provide sex as a payment for friendship (a thing I’ve felt before, a lot), and weeding out folks who are only interested in the bone zone and not the friend zone! My pussy is confused but my heart is like yeah this is chill.
Tight; now I’m gonna go mail letters and copy zines if I can before work and hang out with Jack.
Me n my boo n some serious homies.
Work and party 👶🍕👹
I had a friend date with my new friend and it’s good to talk about your feelings with a person in real life and not just cry to your boyfriend and your friends who are all so far away. Now I’m taking a shit at Dunkin Donuts before starting what I assume will be the longest day at work ever.
I guess Riot Fest is happening. I bailed on a second attempt at hanging out with my friend Jessica who kissed my cheek when I met her last year at a café in Bridgeport with Grazi. The body misses certain kinds of tenderness that you can’t always find in a handshake or a fuck. Last night before I got on the train home Jack gave me a hug and told me to be safe and that’s a nice thing to do for a person.
Today Erika and I went to the Salvation Army and I got a Smashing Pumpkins VHS and missed my Halifax friends. I got a black velvet dress because I had no foresight and left my best fall clothes on the east coast. We got Chinese food with the boys and I passed out in my bed until now. I feel old sometimes. I’m much less of a baby than I once was but little things exhaust me. A whole month seems like forever and days go by really slowly even though I’ve been less alone than I imagined I would be.
Before Harold left we went on dates. To the Soda Factory, to his favorite restaurant in Chinatown, for sushi, to the beach. I had gotten in the water after a show in Indiana but hadn’t been to a sandy part of the beach. The water was much colder already and the waves softer and isn’t it just like September to be like that. I guess I hadn’t felt soft, natural sand before. We walked through with our shoes in our hands and kissed with a full moon and the water hitting our ankles. I told him it was very nice but just not the same as my ocean angry and full of salt.
I didn’t go to the show because I didn’t want to get the train all the way there and back alone. Turns out Macklin came home with a bunch of house guests so I totally would have had company. Oh well. Cody worked a double and took me on a delivery and Jack came in too and we all hung out at their work.
Yesterday I went to the thrift store and cleaned our room and got cherry pie and coffee at some weird café on Clark. It was nice to wear a sweater and feel the kind of sad I always feel in fall.
I wished I had someone to hang out with me in my room but being alone makes you strong. I talked to Harold on the phone in the middle of the night and he told me the sweetest things. I’ve been saving them all up for times when missing him is too much. I’ll be able to see that he loves me more than anyone or that if it won’t work with me it won’t work with anyone. Love is tough but so am I.